Review: Abandon by Meg Cabot

Series: Abandon #1

Publisher: Scholastic

Publishing date: April 26th, 2011

Pages: 320

Buy it: Amazon

Summary: Though she tries returning to the life she knew before the accident, Pierce can't help but feel at once a part of this world, and apart from it. Yet she's never alone . . . because someone is always watching her. Escape from the realm of the dead is impossible when someone there wants you back.
But now she's moved to a new town. Maybe at her new school, she can start fresh. Maybe she can stop feeling so afraid.
Only she can't. Because even here, he finds her. That's how desperately he wants her back. She knows he's no guardian angel, and his dark world isn't exactly heaven, yet she can't stay away . . . especially since he always appears when she least expects it, but exactly when she needs him most.
But if she lets herself fall any further, she may just find herself back in the one place she most fears: the Underworld.

Rating: 2 stars

WARNING: This review contains mentions of wanting to throttle, strangle and maim book characters, and includes potentially traumatizing pictures.

Just look at this summary. Go ahead, read it.
It's amazing, isn't it? And the cover. It's gorgeous. The premise is mysterious, intriguing and lovely. I was SO excited for this book, you don't even know. I think my entire twitter feed knew the instant it was out.

This is why I'm going to be a little hard on it. Because my expectations were high, and there weren't met. At. All.

About the narrator:

This is what I wanted to do to her for half the book. UGH. What a vapid, idiotic, insensitive, shallow, boring person. She's everything I hate in a character. No backbone, changing loyalties, and just this carelessness that I HATE.

    Sure, I'd been kicked out of school. I couldn't seem to go more than an hour without craving a caffeinated beverage. And a guy I'd met while I was dead had popped by unexpectedly and caused me to be slapped with a seven-figure civil suit.
    But I was feeling positive about the future.

... Excuse me???
LOL my daddy has to pay more than a million dollars to a guy but I don't care!

About the writing:

It draaaaaaaagged. She spent ages telling us about how she had been in the Underworld, and some bad "incident" had happened after she came back, but that the incident was different from the accident, and blablablablabla. My god, just get ON with it! The book is just so full of plot holes (like when Pierce loses her necklace, but somehow still has it around her neck?) and stilted, stretched out mock-obstacles.
Also, just like in The Goddess Test (which is also a retelling of the Persephone/Hades myth), the narrator keeps talking about "that". Apparently, spelling out the word sex is a capital offense.

Oh, and by the way, Pierce hates Greek mythology, because it's "complicated and weird and had nothing to do with reality." How the hell do you want me to empathize with her? Seriously? SHE DOESN'T KNOW WHO HOMER IS.

About the romance:

It was ridiculous. And the love interest? His name is John. I don't even know what to say to that. He's a one-dimensional, pseudo swoon worthy "dark" guy that we didn't get to know at all. He behaved all aloof-like and jerky and moody and suddenly bam! His lips came came down over mine etc etc. Of course, the rest of the world ~vanished instantly. Eye roll.

One thing I learned from this book: tassels?
BAD.

EVIL. RUN FOR YOUR LIFE.

Needless to say, I would recommend this book to no one. I know it looks so good and you want to like it sooo bad, but... Yeah. No.

Review: The Goddess Test by Aimee Carter

Series: Goddess Test #1

Publisher: Harlequin TEEN

Publishing date: April 19th, 2011

Pages: 304

Buy it: Amazon

Summary: It's always been just Kate and her mom—and her mother is dying. Her last wish? To move back to her childhood home. So Kate's going to start at a new school with no friends, no other family and the fear her mother won't live past the fall.
Then she meets Henry. Dark. Tortured. And mesmerizing. He claims to be Hades, god of the Underworld—and if she accepts his bargain, he'll keep her mother alive while Kate tries to pass seven tests.
Kate is sure he's crazy—until she sees him bring a girl back from the dead. Now saving her mother seems crazily possible. If she succeeds, she'll become Henry's future bride, and a goddess.

Rating: 3 stars

This is more a 2.5 stars, but I'm rounding up, for once. I don't really know why. My brain works in strange, strange ways.

Here are the annotations I made while reading The Goddess Test. I realized after viewing all of them that they may just tell you as much as my review would, with the bonus of being funnier (I think). Plus I'm lazy. So. Here we go.

- Narrator is not a pushover at school. I was scared she'd have the Bella Swan syndrome (I let everyone say whatever they want to me without reacting because I'm nice.) I have to say it made me like Kate a lot more.

- Seems like Kate is willing to put her life on the line for Henry quite fast. Why is she so willing? Makes no sense. She barely knows him.

- Little too much foreshadowing. She notices everybody's expressions a bit too easily (surely I'm not the only one who can't read perfect strangers' faces like a book, right?) and there are just way too many somethings flickering in everyone's eyes.

- Henry's nod is archaic? ... ????

- Very interesting concept of what happens after death. I loved it. I've never seen that interpretation before, kudos to Miss Carter.

- She keeps referring to sex as "that". Are we in third grade?

- Why is she so harsh on Ava? Stop judging your friends. Seriously. She goes from being this awesome friend (a little too awesome too fast, but Carter gives an explanation about that, so I'm okay with it) to this judging bitchy person because suddenly she's worried about how Henry will see her. Great role model, Kate.

- Her expectations with Henry are quite low. Condemned to always have second role, and she knows it and she's mostly fine with it, why? Idk. I think that's just me, though.

- She's humanized the Greek gods way too much. "I refused to believe he was capable of murder"... Really? Since when do gods care if they kill humans?

- The puppy is CUTE. Omg. So CUTE <3 <3 <3

- Henry is a jerk because he's scared. Eye roll. I've not seen this in a million YA novels before.

- Love this quote:

"Maybe you'll win when hell freezes over."
He raises an eyebrow. "That could easily be arranged."

- WTF JSLDKJLDKJQDS QJD HAPPENED WITH HER MOTHER? WHAT? WHAT? (I can't say more because I don't want to spoil, but... Jesus. Mffh.)

(spoilers. Highlight to see)

- WTF LDJQSLKJSQLSDJQKSDJ HAPPENED WITH THE FINAL TEST? SHE STILL FAILED. I DON'T CARE THAT SHE PASSED HUMILITY AFTERWARD. SHE. STILL FAILED. ONE. TEST. (lol Zeus condemning someone for lusting. Bahahahahahahahaha.) 

- Why does Kate's mother look down on her own daughter like that? She's Persephone's mother too. I know she's not supposed to forgive her child's actions just because she's her mother, but I'm not getting a lot of love vibes from her towards poor Persephone (who broke Henry's heart so I don't ~like her, but still. Girl was kidnapped). It bothered me.

- She forgives everyone way too easily. They all jerked her around for I don't know how many months, her MOTHER has lied to her her entire life, pretending to have cancer (for god's sake) and she's like "mmmkay. I'm mad but oh wait no it's okay. Yaaaaay I'm a goddess." They had to do it, okay, I get that. But does she have to stop being mad at them after 3.2 seconds?

(end spoilers)

- The gods' names. Seriously. Walter? I mean, she explains, I get it. But after Kate finds out who they really are, why does she not call them by their Greek name? I don't like this "what we represent in mytholody" concept.

As you can see... I like talking to myself. Aerm. Anyway.

To those annotations, I will add that while The Goddess Test has its flaws (as... Err, shouted above), it was an enjoyable read. I don't regret reading the book, and I'll certainly pick up the sequel. Carter's prose is nothing to be ashamed of. It's not out of this world good, but she knows how to tell a story and it flows easily enough. She still has to make progress, but it's her debut novel, so I'm waiting to see if she gets better. I feel like a lot of things could have been done better, less clumsily, like the humanization of the gods (I have nothing against it, but to me it was way too much), or Kate's characterization. I like Kate just fine, but I didn't "click" with her, you know? Despite all that, I'd recommend this novel if you want a light, easy read and like Greek mythology without being a die-hard fan.

Also, I really want a puppy.

Review: Lips Touch: Three Times by Laini Taylor

Series: Stand-alone

Publisher: Arthur A. Levine Books

Publishing date: October 1st, 2009

Pages: 272

Buy it: Amazon

Summary: A girl who’s always been in the shadows finds herself pursued by the unbelievably attractive new boy at school, who may or may not be the death of her.
Another girl grows up mute because of a curse placed on her by a vindictive spirit, and later must decide whether to utter her first words to the boy she loves and risk killing everyone who hears her if the curse is real.
And a third girl discovers that the real reason for her transient life with her mother has to do with belonging — literally belonging — to another world entirely, full of dreaded creatures who can transform into animals, and whose queen keeps little girls as personal pets until they grow to childbearing age.

Rating: 5 stars

I truly feel like anything I say couldn't do this book justice.
So, in my endeavor to describe my *cough* "feelings", I made a pie chart (I love pie charts).

This book was amazing. Well-written. Gorgeous, gorgeous writing. Touching characters. I just... I loved it. Every story was better than the last. Enchanting, horrifying, beautiful and captivating. The way Taylor writes... Again, I don't know what to say. She pulls you into the universe she created like no others and makes you truly experience the story she's telling. Her writing grabs you and doesn't let you go. You get attached to the characters, feel their joy and their horror, all the while sinking deeper and deeper into the mesmerizing universe she presents you with.

The way she manages to combine such a vast array of emotion into one story is mind boggling. This book feels like a rainy afternoon spent cuddled up in your blankets with an amazing book and a tub of ice cream. It's a treat you've been waiting for, and savor slowly to keep it as long as possible. It's the kind of book you keep reading at night, secretly, while you're supposed to be sleeping simply because you just can't stop reading. 

While the first story was short, sensual and surprising, the second and third ones were longer, and therefore had their own universe and set of rules. And the writing. God. Her prose is lyrical and flows perfectly. She uses recurrent imagery so well that you can almost picture everything. I kept literally stopping in the middle of a chapter to think "wow, this sentence is gorgeous."

Also, I'd just like to point out that not once, while reading this book did I think anything was remotely wrong with the character development, the pacing, the plot or just... anything. This is rare, people. Very rare. Everything made perfect sense. So much sense, actually, that when Taylor later explains her definition of the "Hell" she used in the second story, it wasn't necessary, because she told it in such a way that it was obvious for anyone, even those not versed in Hindu beliefs like me.

If you're still not convinced, here's a quote:

"[...] they thought the same thoughts as completely as if a butterfly traveled back and forth between their minds, bearing ideas on its legs like pollen."

See? So pretty. So cute and perfect. Sigh.

Really. I'm re-reading myself and I have not done this story justice. Don't take my words for it. Go read it. You won't be sorry.

Review: Starcrossed by Josephine Angelini

Series: Starcrossed #1

Publisher: HarperTeen

Publishing date: May 31st, 2011

Pages: 496

Buy it: Amazon

Summary: How do you defy destiny?

Helen Hamilton has spent her entire sixteen years trying to hide how different she is—no easy task on an island as small and sheltered as Nantucket. And it's getting harder. Nightmares of a desperate desert journey have Helen waking parched, only to find her sheets damaged by dirt and dust. At school she's haunted by hallucinations of three women weeping tears of blood . . . and when Helen first crosses paths with Lucas Delos, she has no way of knowing they're destined to play the leading roles in a tragedy the Fates insist on repeating throughout history.

As Helen unlocks the secrets of her ancestry, she realizes that some myths are more than just legend. But even demigod powers might not be enough to defy the forces that are both drawing her and Lucas together—and trying to tear them apart.

Rating: 2.5 stars

I was so very excited to read this. I basically pounced on the galley as soon as it was available.

I'm going to preface this by saying that this review is subjective. I think a lot of people will like this book. It just... Wasn't for me.

Throughout the whole thing, I kept finding similarities to Twilight. Helen, the narrator, is shy and extremely introverted - like Bella. She's gorgeous, but doesn't suspect a thing - like Bella. She has an absent parental figure and a dad who's basically only interested in sports - like Bella. She has a weak personality disguised in bravado - like Bella. The prose is cheesy at times ("It felt like the most natural thing in the world" "She let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding") and the romance only partly makes sense. Can you... Sense a pattern?

The writing felt clumsy (I think the author used the word "cunning" 3 times in 5 pages) and very deliberate at times. I would read something, a tiny detail, and it was written in such a way that I knew it would be a big part of the plot later. And I hate obvious fore-shadowing.

I also felt like the author wanted Helen to come off as strong. And, well...

"Helen nodded submissively."
"His gaze had such a positive impact on her that she felt unbalanced as soon as his eyes abandoned her."

It's a shame, because this novel had a lot of potential. I love the plot and really enjoyed the mythological aspect (quite an original take on the Trojan war and the gods in general) and would have loved to see it crafted with more subtlety and skills. The romance, although kind of out of the blue (I love watching relationships develop - I'm not a fan of instant attraction), had this kind of je ne sais quoi (again, like freaking Twilight) that made me keep going. I think if Helen and Lucas were less co-dependent, the whole thing would work a lot better.

To sum it up, I think the series has a lot of possibility if the writing gets better. This book is a debut, so I haven't given up hope. I'll probably pick up the sequel whenever it comes out.